Finding Sanctuary

Luke 1:39-55

The verses before our text picks up today, an angel comes to Mary and tells her she is pregnant- she surprisingly takes this news well unlike her partner Joseph. The first thing Mary does after hearing this news is go to see Elizabeth who she knew was also carrying a child. She went to a place of sanctuary. So many fun things about this text today. How fun is it that the text tells us that at the sound of Mary’s voice that the baby in  Elizabeth’s womb leaped? It’s like this unborn child knew this was a safe person- a special person- a family member. We also get to see this story from the women’s perspective which is so different from the man’s perspective. When the angel came to Mary’s betrothed Joseph and Elizabeth’s husband Zechariah both of those men doubted the angel and their voices were silenced- Zechariah by force and Joseph by choice. Here we see how the women embrace the angel and because they believe they go to one another to spend this beautiful time in their lives together. We hear what is called Mary’s song- a stark contrast to seeing a man’s voice being silenced we see a woman getting a lot of screen time here and over the birth of the savior. This isn’t a little part in a play. The scripture reading this way at the time when the Bible was written is truly amazing. It speaks to the upside-down ways of Jesus but also the role of women and what they bring to the table. Verse 45 says And blessed is she who believed that there would be^[g] a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.”

Today we are going to talk about sanctuary. Where do we go to get our own sanctuary? We all need sanctuary. But What is sanctuary?  Sanctuary was originally thought of as a place- a holy, sacred place. We have extended this word to mean more than just a place but something that gives you refuge or peace. We can think of a wildlife sanctuary- a place of safety and nourishment- a place away from danger. Mary went to find sanctuary in Elizabeth- in a safe person who was going through a similar thing. It seemed maybe sanctuary for them was a place, a space to be understood, to be known. It is also the place of God. The text says the baby in Elizabeth’s womb leaped when it heard Mary’s voice- I wonder if it was also because Jesus was a part of her- it says at that point that Elizabeth received the holy spirit in that moment and we know the holy spirit comes from God. This was the original thinking of why all our churches have sanctuaries and why they are the place where we worship- where we thought was the place to meet God. Which it certainly is but we have also learned many places can be sanctuaries- God can be many places.   Is it a physical place? An emotional place? Is it with a certain person? Where is your sanctuary?

Elizabeth is a sanctuary to Mary, and Mary becomes a sanctuary to Jesus- her womb is a sanctuary- creating a safe place for the baby Jesus to grow- How cool that she got to be a sanctuary for Jesus. This shows the truly beautiful aspect of the God that we serve- that a God at one point needed sanctuary from a woman.

The other interesting thing about the sanctuary these women find is that there is absolutely no mention of Elizabeth commenting on Mary’s scandalous pregnancy- an elder relative of this young girl who finds herself pregnant and unwed. Even nowadays there would be some scolding even if there was acceptance. Elizabeth at least in the scripture says nothing.  Maybe this is why it was a sanctuary for Mary- because it was safe and not judgemental. Everyone else who would have known would have judged her and scolded her and made this time of pregnancy miserable. But not Elizabeth. It is an Unlikely sanctuary. I can only guess that Mary knew she would be welcomed and accepted and I am guessing she knew that because both of them heard from the lord and now understood that things were not what they thought they were. Do you see why I love this story and how it portrays women? They listen well, they trust well, they open themselves up to new possibilities, they use their voice, they are strong, they comfort each other- they are social justice warriors who have the humble courage to be changed in order to allow for God to work in this world. I am here for it.

So this unlikely sanctuary- finding safety and peace in a place you wouldn’t typically expect. This could be an actual place or through an unlikely way. I’m reminded of when I get confronted with a harsh reality- many people would not find that a sanctuary but for me- people being real, speaking truth even though it’s hard feels like safety because it’s authentic. I’m always drawn to the people that tell it like it is rather than sugarcoat it. An unlikely sanctuary for me is someone who says, “yeah that’s a really bad spot your in rather than “it’s not that bad”, another one is my dog- I just was never really a dog person and now playing with him or spending time with him feels like a break from the world. Christmas time is also a sanctuary for me- I love the cheesy Christmas movies, the decorations, the hot cocoa, Christmas novels, family gatherings- I draw it out as long as possible because for me it’s this special time of year where celebration is the center and It helps with all the rest. I have so many memories of picking out the perfect tree every year – my brother sister and I would all spread out on the Christmas tree farm and find what we thought was the perfect one- had to big and round and make a statement and then we would call out parents to each of ours to try to convince them whose was best- it was quite the commotion. I hope to create the same traditions with my kids someday.

On her blog, Mihee Kim-Kort a Korean, PCUSA pastor writes of her unlikely sanctuary: “I hide out in the last room I ever thought I would find refuge. Growing up, I would watch my mother buzz around cutting boards, bowls of chopped-up vegetables, and pots and pans on the stove, stopping over each one to stir or smell the contents. Was she a busy bee or more of a mad scientist? Neither does justice to the way she made that space. Frenetic. Dynamic. A little terrifying. I was always in the way. Sometimes I would be asked to chop vegetables, but I did it so poorly I was usually shooed out. Even learning how to make rice in the rice cooker was a delicate art — a seemingly simple task but one that I feel I’ve never gotten quite right until really recently. But I always saw the kitchen as a foreign place, and not my place. Now, I shoo the kids out, too. One day, My mother pulled out the clean rice cooker, and then the rinsing container. After measuring cups of uncooked grains and pouring them into the container, dancing all over like the sound of maracas and feet, seeds falling on the ground like rain, she showed me how to rinse it all in the sink until the water poured clear. The water was cold as she filled it up and massaged the grains in methodical handfuls around the perimeter — like she was coaxing out softness and flavor.

My “desk” is right next to the rice cooker, and I love the smell of it steaming into the room, especially in those last few minutes where it seeps into every corner of the house and envelops everything in the feeling of home and comfort: family around the bapsang (bap meaning cooked rice and sang meaning table), my mother chiding me to eat more, my father demanding more rice, my brother covered in it from head to toe, its stickiness the perfect image of Korean jeong. One Korean-English dictionary defines jeong as “feeling, love, sentiment, passion, human nature, sympathy, heart.”

 She goes on to talk about this tension of being a stay-at-home mom and wondering what it is she’s doing with her life and then she starts to understand her mom a little more as a mom herself. She says, “ I’m doing any number of things: cleaning, prepping for a meal, snacking, and typing away desperately on a laptop or phone. I see why my mom spent so much time in the kitchen now. It was the final domain where she had some semblance of power. I find the kingdom I’ve inherited to also be fraught with tribal clashes and conflicts that flare up at a moment’s notice, so it makes sense to take cover… But before I totally spiral down into that all-too-welcoming, familiar despair, they come running into the kitchen and… I stop and release it all with a loud exhalation. I close the laptop, plug in my phone, and place it high on a shelf. I pull out all the pots and pans, big mixing bowls, spoons, and measuring cups, toss barley rice into each one — and my children are squealing, shouting, and down on the floor with me, running their fingers through the rice, scooping and shaping, transferring and spilling, smelling and tasting the dry rice, and I’m laughing.

I’m laughing at the pandemonium, I’m laughing at how mortified my mother would be if she saw me wasting that rice (though I would likely use what didn’t fall on the floor). I’m laughing at how I’m just a housewife, and how the kitchen is my favorite room in the house. I’m laughing at how I’m more than just a housewife, and then, laughing at the joy of my little kingdom.

Mihee found an unlikely sanctuary. What is your unlikely sanctuary? Take a moment and close your eyes. Where do you find safety? Where do you find nourishment? It might be in an unlikely place or with an unlikely person. Somewhere you never would have guessed. As you think about this try and picture it- what does it look like? How do you feel in this place? Do you feel calm? Alive? Relieved? Does this place have a smell?  Are there any particular sounds? What in particular brings you back to this place? How do you know this is your sanctuary? Take a minute and reflect on what this place does or did for you. What did it give you? Can you recreate that or hold on to it? As you think about what your sanctuary is remember that you might be someone else’s sanctuary or a part of their sanctuary. We find sanctuaries so we can be sanctuaries for one another. The lyrics of a well-known song we sing says O Lord prepare me to be a sanctuary… let that be our prayer- O lord prepare us to be a sanctuary for others. Amen.

As you leave this service, your service begins:  Comfort the homesick. Open your doors to others. Seek sanctuary. Be brave enough to go home by another way. And remember that here in God’s house, all are welcomed—so come back soon. In the name of our Foundation—God, Spirit, and Son— go in peace

Collective Human Flourishing

Luke 3: 1-18

Maybe it was my upbringing, but I am obsessed with fairness (after being married I’m getting better with letting this idea go). When we were young my brother sister and I always had to have things be fair. Looking back, you would have thought we were deprived, and we were anything but. I know some of this is just the results of having siblings- if she gets to do this or he gets to do that well then, I should get to do that as well. The strangest way this played out for us was in food. For having to eat food and not having to eat food. We were the ones that had to sit at the table until we ate everything from our plate. My sister was a picky eater, so she always had to sit there which she felt was unfair because my brother and I liked the food our parents gave us. My dad was also frugal and didn’t buy lots of “treats”.  One of the biggest treats was these hot stuffed cherry peppers that are filled with prosciutto and cheese. This was like before charcutier was big so there weren’t many things like this available. And I know this is an odd thing to like as a kid but for special occasions my dad would buy them and cut them into quarters and we could each have a couple. Making sure we each got an even amount seemed incredibly important because they were so rare.  When it was something we really wanted fairness was the most important factor. Oddly enough I still feel a weird joy in as an adult being able to go to the grocery store and buying a jar of these peppers for myself- still kind of feels too gluttonous or extravagant but alas I have a therapist for that.  But it’s not the same- sitting at home knowing I can eat as many of them as I want. There was something about sharing this experience with my brother and sister.

Today we hear a message of joy especially for those who have felt like they have been given a raw hand or have felt that everything has been stacked against them. John’s words today speak of creating a home for all- valleys and mountains are leveled out, windy ways are made straight. And how will this happen? By humans being selfless, sharing, giving, helping one another to create a place where all are equal, and everyone has enough. John calls the people a brood of vipers because he is so angry that they clearly have not been living this way. He’s angry because this sentiment of sharing resources and seeing the other person as important as yourself is essential in creating a home for all. As silly as it sounds after being used to sharing those peppers for so long it feels wrong to have them all for myself- I much rather share the joy.

When the crowds ask John how to bear the fruit of true transformation, his directions are concrete and practical: Building a home for all requires sharing resources, especially when we have more than we need. It requires establishing relationships of trust, not manipulation or deceit. Building a home for all is an economic endeavor, requiring faithful stewardship and contentment for what you have. John’s message reads like house rules—it is good news to be able to care for one another and be in right relationship.

When there is collective human flourishing there is joy for all. As a whole- this is something that is difficult. There has been no greater example in the last century of this reality than the pandemic- we are all connected- there is no mistake about it- and if we continue to ignore that then people will continue to get hurt or in the case of the Pandemic continue to get sick and die.

I know you all know this- and you do a good job of practicing it- any time we collect donations for someone you guys come through. For Homestretch we collected 3 trees, 3 wreaths, 6 bathroom and kitchen trash bags filled with supplies, ornaments, wrapping paper and 7 gift cards. I know my audience and I know this would be a very different sermon if given to the parents of the students at Georgetown that I minister to or even the students themselves. If I was manipulative I would maybe try and use this sermon to try and get them to get my laundry serviced as well instead of me hauling the laundry back and forth from the laundry room trying to find a washer and dryer that worked while all their bags of laundry sit in a nice line in a lobby as they get picked up by at outside company. But I’m not manipulative and to be honest we don’t get very far by guilt tripping.

The end result is the same- that all peoples needs are met physically, emotionally, spiritually but there is a better way to get there. John says getting to take care of one another is good news and a gift in itself- it’s not just that you are doing the right thing but that you are also benefiting your soul when you take care of another person. People aren’t as interested in doing “the right thing” as they are in creating their own fulfillment. Lucky for us though and most haven’t figured it out- that comes from doing things for others. In verse 8 John charges the crowd to bear fruit worthy of repentance. So as to make up for your past oppression and mistakes. An unpopular opinion but one the Bible seems to support is that we don’t just carry the mistakes we personally have made but we carry the ones from our lineage and heritage as well. John’s whole point is you have to bear your own fruit- live your life in a way that shows you are living differently than those who came before you. And this is a reasonable responsibility for us all. Every generation we realize the oppressive things the generation before us did and as we become aware we then are charged with doing better. It’s a gift to get to right a wrong- not a burden. You would think it’s the greatest burden of all time from the way people complain about having to be decent people sometimes. People see uncovering a scandal and making up for the hurt as a headache rather than an opportunity to create collective flourishing and joy.

Verse 6 says “all flesh shall see the salvation of the Lord.” This isn’t a question- its going to happen. And we have been told time and time again that we will be a part of making that happen. It seems to me that we have cared much more about being blamed than we have about what to do about it. It doesn’t matter that racism began before you were born or the politics that led to mass homelessness and loss of help for mentally ill people happened before you had a say. It doesn’t matter that it was out of your control that the land you now live on was stolen or that there are no affordable places to buy clothing where the clothes are made in suitable conditions. The list of things needing repentance for that you had nothing to do with can go on and on and on. The point is to not who to blame. The point is we are given an opportunity to create human flourishing. We are given a gift. Creating this change is bearing fruit worth repenting.

I think we see this idea woven through history and in the most unlikely of ways because beneath the hunger for power and greed and misguided strategies on how to be happy, we still risk to help each other and feel the temptation to do what’s right. Recently, now don’t judge me- I’ve been watching the show Survivor- okay you can judge me a little. They are like on season 41 or something. I used to watch this show with my family when I was young when it first came out and I recently saw it featured on Netflix and curiosity got the better of me. Survivor for those that don’t know is when like 24 people go to live on this island in Fuji and they are given rice and that’s all they have to make their own shelter and find their own food and figure out how to survive. The one I started watching was ironically called David vs Goliath. They were split into two tribes from the beginning-the David’s were the ones who were the underdogs and have had to fight most their life for where they are and the Goliaths were the ones that Got it easy and were successful and wealthy and it came easy.  it and its weirdly intriguing and interesting. I mean its just interesting that a group of people wants to go live on an island where they are cold and hungry and uncomfortable. Sure, the reward is a million dollars if they win but to be honest as much as the contestants would like that money they are more there for their love of survivor. Most said this was their dream to do and a bucket item list rather than a way to win money. When they get voted off, they aren’t petty- they are happy to have been given a chance to play the game. The most interesting thing I have seen is this tension between wanting to win and genuinely feeling bad for those that get voted off or have to leave. They have these “human moments” where their temptation to shield someone from hurt overrides their strategy and potentially hurts their chances at winning. They have a respect for one another there and you can tell another’s happiness is almost as important as their own. I say almost because this is a game and a reality tv show but if you can see that humanity in a game where you can only win by being selfish then it shows me how selfless we can be if the only way to win is by being selfless.

The only way to win is by being selfless. Ugh that is messy. It’s messy because you put your guard down and are maybe unintentionally hurt so then you feel the need to protect yourself and here the cycle starts. Sometimes it feels like a double-edged sword- to experience joy you need to be selfless but to be selfless probably means enduring some pain or hurt. But maybe the more we practice this selflessness thing- the more trust we can build in each other. It’s like 2 hurt people entering into a relationship- it’s going to take a lot of work on building trust- a lot of reassurance is needed and patience and risk taking, and sacrifice and you do this with the hope that trust will be built and will create a foundation for a relationship that will create healing and joy.

I think our real task for this congregation is not convinced that selflessness is the way to go. But it’s to be willing to let yourself get hurt or betrayed or manipulated as you try to build trust with a world that is not used to trusting, that is not used to genuine selflessness. Our task is to be willing to risk someone trying to take advantage of our kindness or our time. We all have trust issues in this world but as Christians who believe that love and sacrifice and selflessness are the ultimate tools and contain the power to create true change, it is our job to lead this transformation and work through our collective trust issues. Maybe to get to collective flourishing we need to work through our collective trust issues. Many times in transformation and change there is a need for deconstruction- which is a process of dismantling what you thought was true to rebuild what is actually true. Working through these issues is a form of deconstruction. This too is a gift- getting to deconstruct in order to rebuild is a gift. I encourage us to look at righting wrongs, building trust and deconstructing ourselves and our systems as avenues to create flourishing and joy. It’s all about perspective- are you going to see this as a burden or an opportunity? Amen.

Close to Home

Luke 21:25-38

Today begins the season of Advent. Advent is the 4 weeks leading up to Christmas Eve when we celebrate the Birth of Jesus Christ. It’s a time when having now known the story we celebrate this expectant hope and joy with anticipation while also acknowledging that even with the miraculous birth- something will still be missing. Advent is a season of tension- where we patiently wait to celebrate the day that God joined humanity in becoming human- our greatest hope and joy and also where we struggle -knowing that despite this beautiful gift we still feel pain and suffering that is all too real. We don’t pretend in this season that all is well- but we are reminded this season of a tangible hope and joy that God is here and God is with us.

This advent our theme will be Home- discovering what home means, where home is. Exploring homesickness, never quite feeling at home, the safety of home, the joy of building a home.

Rev. Lisle Gwynn Garrity who helped to create this series says, “In developing this series, it has become abundantly clear that the theme of home intersects with the full range of human experience. Home can be soothing and sacred or unsettling and painful. It can be grounding and particular, or it can feel hard to name or pin down. It can be invitational and warm, or it can poke at wounds of exclusion and displacement. For some, home can be the source of war, stolen lands, or economic loss. We navigate this tension of comfort and unsettledness in the season of Advent. In the midst of cheery holiday celebrations, grief and nostalgia may become unwelcome guests. We give thanks for the gifts and blessings of our lives, while longing for the dreams that are not yet realized. We celebrate the closeness of a God who chooses to dwell with us, while remembering what that closeness will cost: Jesus will face displacement, marginalization, suffering, and, ultimately, death. No matter if this season brings great comfort and joy, or hits a bit too close to home, may we remember that God is also just as close.”

As we begin Advent with the “Little Apocalypse” in Luke 21, we remember how far from home we are. The world is not as it should be. Many have lost their physical homes, many feel alone, and many are isolated. Many of us feel as if we are wandering with no clear way forward. This first week speaks to our deep longing—for our home to be made whole, made right, and made well. With deep longing, we watch for God. Thankfully, God enters a homesick world.

Elder Vilmarie Cintrón-Olivieri provides a reflection on our text this morning as he introduces us to the famous Puerto Rican song , “En mi Viejo San Juan”² which has described the sentiments of many in the Puerto Rican diaspora. The song, written in 1943 by Noel Estrada for his brother stationed in Panamá, recounts memories of life in San Juan and the long-awaited return: “My heart remained at the seafront in Old San Juan.” The lyrics go like this: In my Old San Juan, I forged many dreams in my childhood years. My first illusion and my grief of love are memories of the soul. One afternoon I left for a foreign nation, that’s how destiny would have it,
But my heart remained in front of the sea, in my Old San Juan. Goodbye, my dear Borinquen; Goodbye, my goddess of the Sea. I’m leaving now, but someday I’ll return to search for my love,
To dream once again in my Old San Juan. But time passed me by, and destiny fooled my aching nostalgia. And I could not return to the San Juan I loved, that little piece of my soul. My hair has turned gray, life is leaving me, death is calling me. I do not want to die so far away from you, Puerto Rico of my soul! He says, Listening to this song sometimes makes me a little homesick, but, most of the time, it evokes warm, nostalgic feelings and brings forth memories of the cobblestone streets and blue seas of my hometown. When Hurricane María hit Puerto Rico in 2017, the news footage of the massive category 4 storm contrasted with the lovely memories of the island. The words of the song resonated; my heart was, indeed, at the seafront in Old San Juan. The storm passed, and we anxiously awaited news from our families on the island. Homesickness crept in as we were far away from loved ones and wished to be close to them in the moment of need. Days later, el silencio de la espera³ was finally broken by the buzz of a text message: “Estamos bien” (“We’re OK”). Those two words were hope in the midst of chaos. Those words were home. Images of distress, confusion, and fear emerge in Luke 21. In many ways, the feelings that these words evoke mirror the past almost two years of pandemic crisis—a world in turmoil suffering from disasters, both natural and human-made—speaking to the realities and injustices of a chaotic world. Thankfully, Jesus enters this world offering words, not of foreboding, but of hope to a homesick people that felt far away from God and longed to be close to kin in the middle of the crisis. “Stand up and raise your heads,” Jesus said, “because your redemption is near . . . So also, when you see these things taking place, you know that the kingdom of God is near” (v. 28-31). Even in el silencio de la espera, we are reassured that God’s kin-dom is near. Kin-dom, in Ada María Isasi-Díaz’s definition, is “interconnected community, seeing God’s movement emerge from la familia, the family God makes.”⁴ God is close. These are words of hope for a homesick world. These words are home.

We are all homesick for someone, for something. Maybe its what could have been or should have been. Maybe we are homesick for a life we used to have or for someone who is no longer with us. Maybe we are homesick for a place or a feeling. I feel homesick often- homesick for my family of origin, for my hometown, for the community I had in undergrad, for Pittsburgh, and my time in seminary. I’m homesick for summers at the beach and all the Christmas eves my brother and sister and I would sleep in the same bed hardly able to sleep in anticipation for Christmas morning. I still haven’t figured out what to do with the homesickness. If I avoid it then I avoid all the beautiful memories too. For right now I just try and accept it and let it be a part of me. I realized being homesick is a good thing- it means I’ve experienced something that’s worth missing. I realized that home isn’t a destination but that it’s a feeling- one I can cultivate. Jon and I learned this past Monday that our niece and nephew both had covid and that we would not be able to go see his family for Thanksgiving and my family was traveling out west to see my brother and sister so we were on our own this Thanksgiving. At first, we were sad- we felt the weight of how much we were looking forward to seeing our family. There was a homesickness we now felt that we hadn’t before. But then we started to wonder how we could use this to create our own traditions, how we could make this time special in a different way. I realized I wanted to one day be homesick for this newly married, dorm living Georgetown life, and in order to do that I had to cultivate it.

Today we lit the candle of Hope- our hope today comes in the answer to the question- How does God enter a homesick world? God entered Jon and I’s homesick world through making our own version of Thanksgiving dinner because we realized we actually don’t like a lot of the staples. We watched football and strolled along the canal in georgtown and played with our dog making new memories of home. That’s how God entered our homesick world but what about on a grand scale?

How does God enter a homesick world? One of the things I really love about this series is there is a lot of artwork to help us make sense of this season. You might have seen it in the Newsblast this week but if not, I want to draw our attention to a piece of art that might help us better conceptualize how God enters a homesick world. I only have this one copy here but I encourage you when you get home or in your devotional to spend some time with this painting. Describe it.

The author says this- It is peculiar that we begin Advent with adult Jesus offering us a prophecy and parable filled with fear and mystery. This particular scripture is within a longer section of Jesus describing the coming destruction of the temple, a public statement that no doubt added to the conspiracies and plots stirring against him. The fate he speaks of is filled with terrifying details: the temple demolished, false prophets, wars and uprisings, food shortages, natural disasters, persecution, and epidemics (Luke 21:5-24). As we read these words now, this litany of fear and foreboding feels far too familiar—a bit too close to home. When I began this series of visuals, I printed an architectural blueprint on a large piece of cardstock. Using acrylic paint, I added fluid strokes of blue, obscuring the white lines in the blueprint so that the plans for building a home would appear present but also blurred and concealed. I added hints of gold leaf, trying to emulate the texture of paint peeling from the exterior of a building. I then shifted to digital media, photographing the painting from a number of angles and then drawing figures and details into my compositions with my stylus and iPad. As I began this particular image, I imagined a scene of chaos and apocalypse. However, as I drew a woman lifting her head and reaching for the fig tree, I began to see a vision of beauty and hope, a glimpse of one’s whole being awake to wonder. I think we all share a collective homesickness. It feels like nostalgia. It looks like the trauma hiding in our past. It can turn into foreboding fear that robs us of real joy. But in this image and in Jesus’ words, I see a call to resilience despite the difficult realities that confront us. I see a longing so deep that it keeps us reaching—for a home restored, for comfort renewed, for the fruit that is sure to come.

Jen Michel the author of Keeping Place: Reflections on the Meaning of Home- says home is the most fundamental human longing. I think in this view home and belonging are practically synonymous. I think this is our greatest longing because this desire for home we have on this earth- shows us our desire for a home we have not yet experienced- a home that is perfect, a home that is a true place of belonging for us all. Those beautiful memories we have of feeling safe and accepted are but glimpses of what God will offer us- we yearn for this because we were hard wired to- because it is what we were promised. In this painting awake to wonder we are offered the hope that if we are awake as Jesus commands and if we dare to wonder- we can experience God creating tiny places and feelings of home on this earth. It is possible to cultivate more and more of these glimpses of what true safety and love will feel like.

How does God enter your world? In what ways is God creating pieces of home for you to enjoy? Can you let yourself wonder about this? Can you let your wonder show you how God is close- how home is closer than you think? I encourage you this next week to really think about what makes you feel like you are home. Think about your memories from childhood- the things you are nostalgic for. Have hope that these are but a foretaste of what is to come.

Speaking Your Truth

John 18: 33-40

Sometimes, okay often you ask yourself as a pastor do I really believe all that I say? Or is what I think true. Lots of pastors have “things” or their “spiel” mine I think is that we are not alone and in this, there is divine healing. I can go into the theology of this but I have come to believe that knowing we are not alone somehow has saving power. The problem is sometimes I say this so often I feel like a broken record or that I am just saying it to answer someone’s question or because it’s a nice thought. I was pleasantly affirmed recently though in this belief and reminded of why to me this is more than a nice sentiment but to me this is truth.

If you read the newsblast you saw that I recently started seeing a spiritual director which is someone who is not a therapist or a coach per se but someone who is trained to help you connect with the divine in your daily life. They ask you questions like How do experience God? Where do you experience God? What feelings do you have? What creates those feelings? How do you relate to God- questions aimed at finding how you and God connect uniquely. So she asked me some of these questions during our session and for homework, she told me to continue to reflect on where I feel God is speaking in my life. During the session, I had told her that the way I feel I connected with God the most was through people- through relationships-this is how I feel God speaks to me most often- how God gets my attention. So through asking this question to myself last week, I felt God reaffirm me in my belief that not being alone when things get hard does actually make a big difference.

I’m not really into YouTube videos or following people’s lives on social media. I couldn’t tell you the names of actors or musicians or which celebrity is married to which. Nowadays there is a whole world out there online where you can follow people’s lives- athletes, video gamers, people who open packages for a living to show you what’s inside, fashion gurus. I never got on this trend. About a month ago, however, I was on YouTube looking for a trending video to put in my Georgetown weekly e-mail so it would appear I knew what 20-year-olds were into and I came across a video from a girl I knew of in college. Her and her fiancé had gotten YouTube famous for doing the van life so this video popped up because it was trending. It was heartbreaking really- she told the story of how a week before her wedding her fiancé broke up with her to be with someone else- they had bought a house a few months prior had 2 dogs and were going to Mexico on their honeymoon to start IVF.

You may ask why she chose to be so open and tell the world her story. She actually puts out 1-2 videos a week about her journey. She does it to help process her grief- and the money the video makes through adds she admits pay her bills right now but mainly she does it for the community. She’s a beautiful storyteller and I have found myself watching every video so intrigued to hear her story and see how she is doing. Her vulnerability is raw like nothing I have ever seen. She tells her truth and the amazing part is she does it without hurting anybody else. In every video, she makes special note that the outpouring of love and comments- she gets thousands of messages for every video- has been the biggest blessing to her. Her eyes fill with tears of gratitude every time because she feels this community is healing her. She’s not going to be healed by getting back together with her ex or by being closed off from the world- she is being healed by telling her story to thousands of people who share their story back and tell her she’s not alone. She is being healed by telling her truth. I couldn’t put my finger on why after all this time I felt compelled to watch this girl’s life unfold on youtube. What was it about this that intrigued me in some way? And then I realized this is a person being authentic and in my past, this has been how God has shown up in my life. I realized this girl who has a rocky relationship with the church due to her sexual orientation, was helping me with my own faith, my own belief that feeling like we are not alone might actually be the single greatest act of love God can give us.

Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice- said Jesus to which Pilate responds “what is truth? “  We can answer that question in a minute but first we need to look at the Irony taking place in this scene. Pilate is questioning Jesus about being a King- one who is in power- the king Pilate serves is Caesar- one who is proclaimed so based on who he can fight and the wars he can win. Jesus is King based on his ultimate act of non-violence- his perceived submission to power which ends up giving him the ultimate power. The interesting thing is Jesus’ words seem to have gotten to Pilate- yes he still gives him up as the honorary holiday slaughter but he tries multiple times to find a way out. It seems as if Jesus’s claim that those who belong to the truth listen to him spoke to Pilate- he was intrigued enough to ask the question, “what is truth” which means you are probably missing it or craving it or pondering it.

  The word Truth in Greek is Alethia- meaning unclosedness,  truth of idea, reality, sincerity, truth in the moral sphere, divine truth revealed to man, straightforwardness. In our scripture today the word is meaning a religious truth.

So- what is truth? I only had one class my freshmen year of college on Philosophy so this is an intimidating question. We can look at how truth is different from fact- facts are true but not all truth is fact. Something can be true for you that isn’t true for someone else- tricky, isn’t it. That makes truth messy. I think we so badly want truth to be fact that we act like it is but it doesn’t work very well and now we just go around being insensitive to each other because truth isn’t fact. So we all have our own truth. But as Christians, we also have a bigger truth outside of ourselves- the truth that God exists. The truth that this God as displayed in the man of Jesus Christ gave us real-life examples of bravery, radical inclusion, non-violent ways to make peace, humbleness, vulnerability, love, hope. The Hebrew word emmet,  means “truth.” But it means “truth” in a very specific sense. The word itself has a structure that makes it mean more than just a truth or this or that truth. Emmet means the whole truth: beginning, middle, and end, and this meaning is based on the word itself and its relation to the Hebrew Alphabet.

Some of the Hebrew letters have two forms: a form for when the letter appears at the end of a word and a form for when the letter appears any other time. If the whole twenty-two letter alphabet were listed out plus the five final forms of the letters that have one, there would be twenty-seven characters. Then, if you took the first, 14th, and 27th letters, the first, middle and last, you would have the letters that make up the word emmet. Truth is not just one piece of the truth, but the whole thing, beginning, middle, and end. If some part of the truth is left out, then it is not really the truth.

The second treasure hidden in the word emmet, that I found was that the letters of the Hebrew alphabet also double as numbers. The first letter, aleph, represents the number one; the second letter, bet, represents the number two; etc. The number one is symbolic of God, Who is One. “Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One,” is one possible translation of the Shema. No other society has been as vehemently monotheistic as the Jews. That first letter of the alphabet that represents the number one is also the first letter in emmet. But when that letter is removed from emmet, only met remains, which is the Hebrew word for death. Take away God from truth, and you get death. Include God, and you get fullness of truth. As a Christian, I see symbolized in that word the miracle that when God unites Himself with us in our death, we see the full truth of God’s love for us.

There is unity and beauty of emmet in a lot of philosophy, most especially, the philosophy of St. Thomas Aquinas. Make God the beginning of truth, and everything else is illuminated. With the God Who Is, we can make sense of everything we experience and that by which we experience everything else: our very selves. Remove God, and truth and reality, and the human person fall apart. Include God, and even things as ordinary to us as words have more meaning than we know.

I really like this view because it doesn’t try and say who God is or what kind of God this is but it emphasizes that without God things don’t make sense- without God, we get further away from knowing truth- ourselves and our world. We can still have room to figure out what truth God represents, what truth God makes possible. My other spiel or “thing” is that I think we can only know ourselves as much as we know God and vice versa. The more we understand God, the more the things of truth become clear to us- the more truth can be an indicator for how to order our lives.

So we have these 2 main ideas of truth- Alethia- unclosedness- reality- a statement that God is reality. And Emmet – the whole truth- the beginning middle and end which is God. Both are philosophical because it’s too difficult to give an exact definition- truth and God both encompass a reality- God is more than a person or a spirit- God is truth. To deny the things of God because God is not one thing is to deny yourself, to deny the way things work, to deny how to do this life well. We also see this other confusing aspect of Jesus being the truth while also telling the truth- as with us as Christians we can be living the things of truth- and also telling the things of truth.

What’s the cost of telling the truth?

Well for Jesus it was his life. For us though, I think its us being honest with ourselves and the world. It’s scary and intimidating and the most difficult. People may tell you you’re too much- your truth is too much. You might feel like a burden- like if you tell your truth-you are adding to someone else’s truth. You might feel like a lot- and you don’t want to be a lot- you want to be a little. You might feel like you are too intense or more than someone signed on for as a friend or a spouse or a family member. This is the cost.

What’s the point of telling the truth?

So if that’s the cost- even though it’s not death it’s not enjoyable-  why do it? Well, Jesus healed the world through telling the truth. I think true healing will come in the end but in the meantime, I think Jesus’ example of telling the truth helps us understand how healing is possible here and now. The point of telling the truth is so that you can heal.

The girl in the video told her truth and in telling her truth she is finding healing. The stories we read in the Bible I don’t think are just nice stories or bad stories but that if we learn what they want to tell us they have the power to help us. This story today is about the power of telling the truth and the importance of it. Because of Jesus’ courage to tell the truth,  when we tell our own truth- freedom, comfort, acceptance, love, and so on and so forth can be felt. This is God saying to each one of you in a world still filled with unimaginable suffering, “I am with you, you are not alone”.

Friends, there is much about the Bible that is hard for me to get behind or believe, but that God created and showed us ways to feel and give love and healing on this earth for redemption here and now is not one of them. I believe God is very much alive and yearns to comfort us in our suffering and maybe just maybe God is doing that through people being vulnerable on YouTube and maybe you will find God’s comfort in your suffering by beginning to tell your truth. I for one am here to listen to your truth and let you know you are not alone.