Words that Pollute

Mark 7

I’m going to steal a story from Jon’s dad that he tells about Jon when he was a kid. I think this story is so funny especially for me as someone who comes from a family that was very comfortable expressing our anger. So at around 8 years old, Jon’s dad had gotten a job at Penn State and so they had to move from Charlottesville to state college. Jon was so mad at them and he was telling his dad he was scared he wasn’t going to make any friends and he wasn’t going to like it and His dad was reassuring him that he would make friends and he would like his new school and their new house and he just yelled at him, “how do you know, what are you, psycho? Obviously, he meant psychic… I love this story because as a little kid Jon was so sweet and innocent he didn’t even know how to be mean except by accident. The scripture today is talking to those who are trying to be mean not by accident but on purpose.

The Message: The Pharisees, along with some religion scholars who had come from Jerusalem, gathered around him. They noticed that some of his disciples weren’t being careful with ritual washings before meals. The Pharisees—Jews in general, in fact—would never eat a meal without going through the motions of a ritual hand-washing, with an especially vigorous scrubbing if they had just come from the market (to say nothing of the scourings they’d give jugs and pots and pans). ⁵ The Pharisees and religion scholars asked, “Why do your disciples brush off the rules, showing up at meals without washing their hands?”^6-8 Jesus answered, “Isaiah was right about frauds like you, hit the bull’s-eye in fact: These people make a big show of saying the right thing, but their heart isn’t in it. They act like they are worshiping me, but they don’t mean it. They just use me as a cover for teaching whatever suits their fancy, Ditching God’s command and taking up the latest fads.”^9-13 He went on, “Well, good for you. You get rid of God’s command, so you won’t be inconvenienced in following the religious fashions! Moses said, ‘Respect your father and mother,’ and, ‘Anyone denouncing father or mother should be killed.’ But you weasel out of that by saying that it’s perfectly acceptable to say to father or mother, ‘Gift! What I owed you I’ve given as a gift to God,’ thus relieving yourselves of obligation to father or mother. You scratch out God’s Word and scrawl a whim in its place. You do a lot of things like this.” ^14-15 Jesus called the crowd together again and said, “Listen now, all of you—take this to heart. It’s not what you swallow that pollutes your life; it’s what you vomit—that’s the real pollution.”

¹⁷ When he was back home after being with the crowd, his disciples said, “We don’t get it. Put it in plain language.”^18-19 Jesus said, “Are you being willfully stupid? Don’t you see that what you swallow can’t contaminate you? It doesn’t enter your heart but your stomach, works its way through the intestines, and is finally flushed.” (That took care of dietary quibbling; Jesus was saying that all foods are fit to eat.) ^20-23 He went on: “It’s what comes out of a person that pollutes: obscenities, lusts, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, depravity, deceptive dealings, carousing, mean looks, slander, arrogance, foolishness—all these are vomit from the heart. There is the source of your pollution.”

I love this passage but as is this passage doesn’t give me the same satisfaction preaching to you all as it would if I were to preach it to another congregation- one less accepting. That is not to say that we don’t need to hear this message or that we do things perfectly but for the most part from what I’ve seen you all are open and accepting and not stuck in your ways. Even though I wouldn’t stereotype us hypocritical or pharisaical, I still feel like there must be a message for us here. That’s the interesting thing about the word of God- it may not be flawless or factual but it’s clever for sure. I don’t think Jesus was ever just speaking to one people group. He might have used one people group as the example for the lesson but it doesn’t mean that just because we don’t get into a tizzy about not following rules that we don’t have something to learn here.

So regardless of the audience, what’s the message Jesus is trying to get across? It seems like there are 2 major lessons. The first- don’t twist Gods word to fit your own agenda. He gives a pretty good example of how people did this within their families- back then it was custom that the children would support their parents when they were able as is still custom in many cultures. It appears that some children tried to be clever out of their greed and misused scripture to say that their earnings should go back to God and not to their parents. Clearly these people are not well intentioned and care more about themselves. Jesus is pissed here probably because hes sick and tired of people putting words in his mouth. To honor your father and your mother means to take care of them, to respect them. Blaming God for why you can’t do that is missing the point.

The second major lesson seems to be how people use their words, their influence. He says only the things that come out of you can defile a person- he says in particular the things that come out of your mouth- words.

In Bible Study we started imagining what heaven would be like- a heaven that is pretty similar to this world just without the suffering and evil and harshness. We came across all types of obstacles like how would we know what love was or appreciate it if we didn’t have something less than to compare it to. Or will we work, have purpose? Will we maybe just remember the bad things here so we appreciate the good in this heaven? On and on we went because its fun if not accurate. Anyway it made me realize its hard for me to actually conceptualize a world very similar to this where we work and have purpose if people were only kind, understanding, empathetic, encouraging. First of all lots of people would be out of jobs- would we need therapists or all the people who write books on conflict resolution or mediators? But on a serious note- it seems too good to be true. If there were no fear or insecurity or greed to make us say hurtful things to one another, what would that feel like? What would it feel like to feel loved by those who you love all the time no matter what. It feels scary to hope for because it feels too good to be true. But if the gospel is not hope then I’m not sure what it is- this is the type of afterlife we were promised after all- and this passage further reinforces that beautiful vision of a life without obscenities, lusts, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, deceptive dealings, carousing, mean looks, slander, arrogance and foolishness.  Jesus says these things contaminate us.

So the 2 lessons- don’t twist Gods words and choose your words wisely. I don’t think we have to be the pharisees of today to gain something from these lessons. Can anyone say they have never twisted Gods words to meet their own agenda or that they haven’t hurt others with their words? Yeah, me neither. I know I am a pastor but for the most part I try not to speak for God- I don’t want to get caught up in that. When in doubt I say I don’t know which is most of the time. Ooh but the choosing your words wisely one- that hits home.

You know the age old saying- sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me. Who came up with that? It should say, stick and stones can break my bones but pretending words can never hurt me will destroy me. In the past couple decades it seems that maybe we are seeing this lie for what it is- words can do unfathomable damage. Yet knowing the damage, I still don’t think before I speak nearly as much as I should. It’s purely selfish- I’m never trying to hurt someone but I feel like this thing needs to be said or I feel I can’t hold it in any longer and then its out to do what every irreparable damage it might do.

I follow this one therapist on Instagram and her and her husband did a story on how a word can trigger past experiences and so they try and find similar meaning words to exchange them for. In this example the husband had said he was disappointed in a decision they had mutual come to. She was disappointed as well but the fact that he said the word disappointed really hurt her and she realized it was because when she was young her mom one time told her she was really disappointed in her and that feeling has stuck with her ever since. It made her feel like her husband was disappointed in her when he was just disappointed in this situation. They decided to swipe out the word disappointed for bummer and were able to have a much more productive conversation about it. Now this might seem like a trivial example to you but I think this is the work we have to do.

Not many of us are going around yelling obscenities or saying overtly awful things to people. We all know the saying hurt people hurt people. Some hurt more than others. We can’t control how other people deal with their hurt but we can control how we deal with our hurt.  Most often the hurt we do presents itself in our everyday conversations- in what we say and don’t say. If hurtful words can cause someone to not want to live anymore what are the power of kind words? How do we think before we speak? How do we begin to internalize the power of our words? How do we have saying kind things become a natural part of our being?

The first thing I think we have to check in with ourselves daily about the hurt we are feeling. We have to sit with it and feel it. Part of saying hurtful things to others is a form of running from or denial of your own hurt. It is our own responsibility to deal with our pain so we don’t intentionally or unintentionally cause someone else pain. We hate sitting with our pain- we will do anything to avoid it- we cope with all types of substances that help us not to feel things. We start relationships we don’t want as distractions. We begin to avoid ourselves so we don’t have to acknowledge and deal with the hurt. But all these things exacerbate the problem and then make it worse when it starts to effect other people.

Sit with the pain. Invite the pain in. Make it your friend. As your pastor I am going to say I think this is more important than sitting down and taking time to read scripture. Reading scripture is important but when we insist on using our only down time to read scripture because that’s what “ God tells us to do”  instead doing the hard work inside of ourselves as Jesus tasked us too then we too are using God as a cover. We twist God words to fit our own agenda and miss the point. I went to this workshop last Sunday afternoon at a play called dayspring in md. It was this workshop put on by a woman named jean who has a nwc called Earthen hands- I told her I want to bring as many of you who want to go out there with me. It’s beautiful- there are lakes and ponds and labyrinth, and fields and flowers and its completely still. You just feel peacefulness wash over you when you get there. We began the afternoon meditating while playing with clay in our hands- we used it as a way to focus our minds on relaxing and letting the stress leave us- it helped us be present. And then we wandered the property on our own for an hour just being present with nature and enjoying it. These were 2 simple acts and yet they  were so comforting. Take a walk with your pain in nature and just let it be with you. Do something with your hands as you let the pain sit with you. Maybe you go buy a slab of clay, or you sketch or paint or knit or build. Work out what’s inside you before it comes out as pollution.

Prayer as Therapy

Ephesians 6:10-20

 I have been in and out of therapy now for about 10 years- I really enjoy therapy- the challenge, the hope that I can improve and to be honest- it’s really nice to get to talk about yourself for an hour and eb completely honest about everything without any consequences. I am an 8 on the enneagram and so that means most times I can be pretty blunt and straightforward, and I don’t realize that some things I say could be considered rude or insensitive so in therapy I can speak freely and it is freeing. But one of the the biggest things I have learned in therapy and then in reading more about therapy and psychology and relationships is that humans like to problem solve, we like to fix- its our go to. The problem is that at least in our personal lives, many times when we have a problem, we aren’t actually looking for someone to fix it- we just want someone to listen and empathize with us. How many times have you vented to a spouse, or a close friend and they quickly go into fix it mode and you become annoyed at them? You don’t want their advice or the story of how they were in a similar situation and how it all worked out for them. Most things you really need “fixed” are things they can’t talk about anyway. I recently read a social media post from an acquaintance who is finally expecting a child after many fertility issues. She wanted to tell her story of how many people in trying to be helpful were not helpful because they kept trying to fix a situation, they had no control over. She simply needed them to listen to her and comfort her. I don’t fall prey to clickbait often but when it comes to articles about how to communicate with your spouse, I click- and every time it warns- don’t try and fix it- just listen. So, we like to fix other peoples problems but when it comes to our own we just want someone to empathize and listen. So you might be wondering what does this have to do with our scripture this morning but we will come full circle, I promise.

This is a sermon about prayer- recently I’ve been hearing about peoples doubts with prayer or confusion about what prayer is, what it does, why we do it. Prayer is considered one of the foundational tenants of our faith and yet most of us have many questions about it. Maybe you understood it at one point but after some life experience, you are having trouble understanding it’s purpose. Maybe prayer is even something you do in church because it’s what we do but it doesn’t actually mean a lot to you. Maybe you don’t even pray. So today we are going to struggle together to look at some of these questions. We might not end up with a lot of answers but at least we can ask the questions and start to understand.  In the scripture this morning we hear about the armor of God, and we see this armor consists of truth, righteousness, peace, faith, salvation, and the spirit. But after that we see 3 verses dedicated to prayer and the plea to pray.

One of the things we can take from the armor of God scripture is that humans are not supposed to fight against each other- its not supposed to be flesh against flesh- that is missing the point. The scripture ends with this emphasis on prayer which is in itself supposed to be for others- we hear the plea to pray for all the Lords people. There is no fighting other humans here- there is the hope for their safety and well-being.

I can’t help but read this scripture today and think about the overwhelming catastrophes happening both in Haiti and in Afghanistan. People are desperate- if you watch the news you see people hanging onto the bottoms of planes as they take off and there are villages in Haiti with severely injured people have still not been reached and have not gotten medical care. I watch the news and there are stories about families not being able to afford childcare and so many children getting sick with Covid and not having enough bus drivers to get kids to school and trans people being denied medical care and wildfires destroying peoples houses and wildlife and on and on and on.

So we need to pray. And maybe you say- what is prayer going to do? We need action – prayers aren’t enough. I agree- to an extent. Prayer is not enough but I don’t think we can do the action without the prayer. We can try but I don’t think we will be able to accomplish as much. The other hard truth is- we can only do so much. There are only so many hours in a day. Can we do more? Yes. But when faced with all there is to do- we become overwhelmed and paralyzed and probably do less than if we felt empowered to do something that was achievable and realistic.

We probably don’t like to hear “we can only do so much” but it’s true. I don’t say this to let people off the hook- this is for the people who are carrying too many burdens and are kicking themselves for not doing more. You are 1 person- who is already doing a lot and feeling badly that you are not doing more isn’t going to “fix” more problems. What is the correct amount of importance we should feel? Important enough to know we can make a difference but unimportant to know that alone we can’t do that much. Important enough to know that you matter but unimportant enough to know that you can’t do it all. We need to find the middle ground where we are inspired and motivated at our potential but not overwhelmed and paralyzed at the job ahead of us. I think prayer helps us find this balance. Prayer helps us acknowledge the need and the ability to meet the need. It helps us to not get too overwhelmed and focus on what we can do- in some cases that calls for action and others for listening.

 There is a quote by an unknown author that says “do not make prayer a monologue…make it a conversation”. Prayer first and foremost is a conversation with God and I think with yourself. When you pray, what happens? You step outside of your personal world for a moment to give time to someone else’s. You express empathy and compassion. You may feel joy or hurt. You yearn to want to help make it better. I believe God can speak in the silence but I wonder if God is more so speaking through the requests- what does God say back about Haiti and Afghanistan and sick children and poverty? Maybe every time you pray- God speaks to you, makes you more human and you don’t even realize it.

I think we pray for different reasons- the first reason I think we pray is for support and connection. Most often we talk about prayers of petition- asking for something for someone else or prayers of supplication- asking for something for ourselves. This is where things get confusing- sometimes requests seem to be granted and sometimes they don’t- why? Did I not pray hard enough, is my faith not strong enough? Is it because I’m being punished for all the wrong I have done? Why is God playing favorites? God is God- he could save that person or kept that thing from happening, but he didn’t. why? What comfort is there to take from unanswered prayer?

And then how do we measure that against those who feel exuberant joy when they feel God has answered a prayer- for those who believe a miracle has happened to them? How in the world do we hold these two experiences together?

The short answer is I don’t know- but the more complicated, educated guess type of answer is this: I think over the centuries we have read our own agendas, desires, false understandings of God into what prayer is. We have come to think of God like a Genie who gives us three wishes- wishes we get to use in the form of prayer and when we don’t get that wish granted, we have an ax to grind with the big guy upstairs. Where did we get this from? I don’t see the Bible talking about prayer this way. We see miracles and healings happen, but they aren’t necessarily related to prayer.

I don’t think the purpose of prayer was to ever grant a request. I think prayer is more like a very wise self-care technique to help us out in this chaotic, overwhelming world. Prayer is a way to connect with yourself, to connect spiritually to gospel- which is the good news and to connect with the suffering of your neighbors around the world. Prayer is how we humble ourselves, how we empathize, how we ask for help, and be vulnerable and remember that we need things- like support and comfort and to be heard and we also need to be needed and to get fulfillment from helping others and let others know they are not alone.

Prayer is a way of sharing the burdens of this world that paralyze us. When we pray as a community it’s a chance to come together and openly talk about the pain- its therapeutic- not magic. It’s realizing we are all generally going through the same things- just differently. It’s a release to make space for what’s next.

Prayer is not supposed to fix things- that is why we need more than prayer. But prayer enables us to be able to go fix things.

Prayer also gives us hope- most people whether they are religious or not appreciate when someone says they will pray for them if they are sick or suffering. When disaster happens people who don’t normally pray start to pray. Why? It is the human response to pray when they don’t know what else to do. When desperation strikes, prayer is a natural response even for those its not normally natural for. And I think that is because it gives us hope. It gives us hope that at least we can do something- even if that something is just talking about it- trying to make sense of it- not keep it all bottled up. Something happens when you share something with someone, and it is not just yours anymore. Prayer is like that.

I think prayer is not so different from the communication I talked about at the beginning of the sermon. If you come to think of prayer not as wish requesting service but as the loved one that comforts, you when you are suffering it becomes something that can help us. Afterall, we just want to share our problems and receive empathy. Maybe prayer is so hard because it doesn’t involve us fixing anything or problem solving- it involves us being with one another in pain or doubt or sorrow or uncertainty. We don’t like just being, we like doing. And maybe we don’t like that God is a being God and not a doing God but from what I can tell God is a being God- not a doing God. Maybe prayer teaches us how to be. To be with, to comfort, to listen, to empathize, to receive grace, to love. Maybe prayer teaches us more how to be human.

As for prayers of petition and supplication- I wonder if these two aren’t for a bigger purpose than getting what we ask for. Like praying for comfort, it teaches us the importance of Hope and the importance of asking for help. One of the other things that maybe we have misunderstood that does more harm than good is the idea of “God’s help”.  Thinking of God as purely a man who used to live or a spirit or some kind of spiritual being I think takes away from how prevalent and meaningful God can be in our lives. In the Bible there is so much evidence of God being interchangeable with Love. We hear God is love but if God is actually love. Whenever love happens- when its shown, experienced, realized- that is God- not like God or makes us appreciate God but is actually God. This thinking will require you to let go of the idea of God as a person. In other scriptures we hear of God being within us because we were formed from the same stuff that Jesus was, the spirit is within us- if we go with this line of thought- its theologically accurate to say we are all God to each other- not that we all think we are God but say you are struggling and during that time someone comes into your life and becomes a friend and is with you in it- isn’t that God? The things of God- peace, love, joy, comfort- come in the forms of people, nature, real life experience.

So if you start to believe that God is with you whenever you experience or witness love or when you are around people or in nature then maybe your prayers of petition and supplication are answered just not in the way you thought or in the form you thought they would be. Maybe they are answered in the form of love or a friend.

If you take away 3 things from this sermon I hope they would be:

1. God is not a genie and prayers are not wishes. This is a human constructed way to look at prayer. This might be disappointing, but I don’t think holding God responsible for something God did or didn’t do is the answer.
2. God shows up in the form of love. If you experience love as the bible describes it- God is there with you.
3. God shows up in people. God is people. To have a relationship with God is to have a relationship with people. The only way we know anything about God is through a person- Jesus.

We don’t have any issue with prayer or even with God. We have an issue with the way we have been constructed to think about prayer and God. So lets take a couple minutes to pray and listen and think about what the world is going through right now. Lets take this time to converse with ourselves and God about the suffering happening in the world. Lets begin to think about what the prayer itself can do for us and less about the requesting. I’m going to set my timer for 3 minutes and you will hear a gong when our time of prayer is over. A

Redemptive Narratives

John 6: 51-58

Earlier in the chapter Jesus refers to himself as the bread of life- In this text we get some cannibalism vibes but if we take it as a metaphor we understand that bread is nourishing and life-giving. In this metaphor is also a promise that you will never be hungry- never be thirsty. That’s quite a promise. What do we do with that promise? We have all felt times of emptiness and we know plenty of people are hungry and here Jesus promises with him we don’t have to be.

In the text, Jesus mentions manna twice- which means there is some connection here we are supposed to make? With manna in the OT you could only have enough for the day- if you tried to hoard it and save it- it went bad. The word Manna meant the Lord provides. God was there to provide and protect. But now Jesus says this is different- you can have it whenever, wherever, as much as you want. It will never go bad. There is an abundance here. Christ is the manna- in the OT manna was a symbol but it was actual food to keep them alive and now we see Christ as the manna- Christ is what sustains, nourishes, gives life.

How does Christ meet that hunger, that thirst? In verse 39 it says “That I should lose nothing of all that he ( God) has given me, but raise it up on the last day.” Jesus Came to resurrect people. Jesus came to give new life and this is how I think he meets that hunger.

As a Church, we only talk about resurrection around Easter yet that’s the essence of our faith- not something that happened once or even once a year but something that happens daily.

One of the things that makes our faith different than others is this is a faith of resurrection- when Christ was resurrected we were all given resurrection- this bread, this faith, this belief enables us to have mini resurrections all the time- to constantly be made new, made whole again. We know we can’t escape being broken, buried, but we can be resurrected.

We can start anew. We can begin again. How many times do you wish you could start over. How many times do you wish you could be better? To try again? I think the beauty of our faith is that you can. Who you were is not who you are. You can grow and change and evolve.

I know sometimes its difficult to see people evolving but I see stories on the news in the morning about people changing their minds about vaccinations and people changing their minds about politics. Maybe the change isn’t as fast as we think it should be, but there is some change happening.

I could point to a lot of things that keep us from changing faster, from resurrecting but I think the number one contender is shame. It tells us we are not worthy of change or grace or being made new. But Christ came to take away shame. Shame is the stale bread. Shame will make you sick. Shame says you are all the bad things you’ve done, the naïve things you’ve thought, the harmful actions you have taken.

Jesus says- you are not those things. You are my beloved and I have come to give you new life- again and again and again.

I think sometimes we are so convinced we can’t fix it, we’ve dug the hole too deep, it’s too late that we have stopped trying. We accept that we have dug our own grave and we resign to lie in it. Maybe you have severely hurt someone you love, messed up in a relationship. Maybe you have caused major disappointment or misrepresented your true self because of ego. We are human- it is impossible to not disappoint or fail or hurt others or make mistakes- its part of being human. But another part of being human is refining- learning, correcting, trying again.

Think about something in your life that you think is too late too fix. Too late to make right. That perception you have of yourself that isn’t good. That thing that breeds guilt and shame and self-hatred and doubt.

It is not too late. You are not forever the person who did that thing. You are given a chance for resurrection- to try again to be your true self.

One of the hardest things I saw in the VA were people who genuinely believed they couldn’t change- that they couldn’t get clean. They had done so many things they were ashamed of that they couldn’t find it in themselves to think there were worth getting better. For many it’s not that they can’t beat this addiction but it’s a form of self-sabotage- they don’t believe they should get to get better. They don’t believe they deserve it. They might not say this-although some will- but it is a belief so deeply held they believe it to be true.

I’m not into the self help craze that much but there is something that I actually think is biblical- the idea that we write our own narrative. Obviously, we don’t write all of it- there is plenty of bad things that happen to us that we would never write into our own stories. I don’t think we are in control of what happens to us necessarily but I the way we think about things, what we believe, has a big effect on how we experience our lives. We tell ourselves narratives about everything all day that all make up what we think about ourselves and our lives. We tell ourselves stories about who we are, how we relate to others, about our relationships or success.

Northwestern University psychologist Dan McAdams is an expert on a concept he calls “narrative identity.” McAdams describes narrative identity as an internalized story you create about yourself — your own personal myth. Like myths, our narrative identity contains heroes and villains that help us or hold us back, major events that determine the plot, challenges overcome and suffering we have endured.

An individual’s life story is not an exhaustive history of everything that has happened. Rather, we make what McAdams calls “narrative choices.” Our stories tend to focus on the most extraordinary events, good and bad, because those are the experiences we need to make sense of and that shape us. But our interpretations may differ. For one person, for example, a childhood experience like learning how to swim by being thrown into the water by a parent might explain his sense of himself today as a hardy entrepreneur who learns by taking risks. For another, that experience might explain why he hates boats and does not trust authority figures. A third might leave the experience out of his story altogether, deeming it unimportant.

People who believe their lives are meaningful tend to tell stories defined by growth, communion and agency.

People who are driven to contribute to society and to future generations, Mcadams found, are more likely to tell redemptive stories about their lives, or stories that transition from bad to good. There was the man who grew up in dire poverty but told McAdams that his hard circumstances brought him and his family closer together. There was the woman who told him that caring for a close friend as the friend was dying was a harrowing experience, but one that ultimately renewed her commitment to being a nurse, a career she’d abandoned. These people rate their lives as more meaningful than those who tell stories that have either no or fewer redemptive sequences.

The opposite of a redemptive story is what McAdams calls a “contamination story,” in which people interpret their lives as going from good to bad. One woman told him the story of the birth of her child, a high point, but she ended the story with the death of the baby’s father, who was murdered three years later. The joy over the birth of her child was tainted by that tragedy. People who tell contamination stories, McAdams has found, are less “generative,” or less driven to contribute to society and younger generations. They also tend to be more anxious and depressed, and to feel that their lives are less coherent compared to those who tell redemptive stories.

Redemption stories allow individuals to craft a positive identity: they are in control of their lives, they are loved, they are progressing through life and whatever obstacles they have encountered have been redeemed by good outcomes.

Even making smaller story edits to our personal narratives can have a big impact on our lives.

One of the great contributions of psychology and psychotherapy research is the idea that we can edit, revise and interpret the stories we tell about our lives even as we are constrained by the facts. A psychotherapist’s job is to work with patients to rewrite their stories in a more positive way. Through editing and reinterpreting his story with his therapist, the patient may come to realize that he is in control of his life and that some meaning can be gleaned from his hardships.

 So, How do our beliefs change the narratives we tell ourselves? I believe that in Jesus we see that we worship a redemptive God that redeems us all. Does your understanding of God, your belief in that redemption cause you to tell redemptive narratives about your life? Or Are you telling contamination narratives, and if so why do you think that is? What is keeping you from giving in to the redemption? To allowing resurrection to happen?

Everywhere we look we can see stories of redemption and resurrection- look at paul from the Bible or the Olympic athletes that medaled after giving child birth when many said they would never be able to or the stories of those who struggled with addiction that are now helping those who used to be in their shoes.

Jesus offers the chance to tell our story as a redemptive one because that’s what it actually is- redemptive to its core. You can tell yourself a contamination story and it will become that but it just as easily could be a redemption story- its up to you.

Sometimes I wonder if people shy away from the redemptive narrative because it seems too good to be true. In the show Westworld, there is a make believe world with robots as humans called hosts. Rich people pay to come to this world for their own personal enjoyment. Here they can play cowboy and sin all kinds of sin that “don’t count” because what happens it Westworld stay in Westworld. The hosts all have pre-programmed narratives they follow. The oldest host, Dolores’ narrative is the girl next door that thinks her life is wonderful. Every day when she opens her eyes she recites these lines, “ Some people choose to see the ugliness of the world, the disarray. I choose to see the beauty. To believe there is an order to our days. A purpose.”. The things is though everyday something horrible happens to Dolores but her memory is wiped clean so she doesn’t know. This would be a good example of someone who believes in the inherent good expect for the fact that she is a robot and isn’t allowed to think for herself and her memory is wiped clean every night. For her, her belief in good is naïve. I wonder if people fear they will become like this girl if they start to look on the positive side- that they are weak or foolish. Westworld is not real life but what is real life is that we are not robots- we can think for ourselves, we don’t get our memory erased but we can decide how we remember things. We are loved at our core, love has the power to change things along with grace and we have the ability to make others feel joy and peace and that my friends is a gift. That right there is enough for a fundamental belief in the good, in the beautiful. I refuse to accept that to believe in the good is naive.

For me, a lot of narratives could have become contaminated but I think because of my belief in the inherent good I edit the stories to reflect what I want to remember- and I don’t think this is deceptive- I think it’s a form of gratitude- at least for me. Everyone keeps asking how our honeymoon was and they ask as if it’s like this fairytale experience- now a days most couples have been on a trip before their honeymoon so its not a first or have known each other long enough to get annoyed at their habits or you are still working on how to travel well together. It’s also as if people forget in many travel experiences there is a lot that can go wrong- airline problems, language barriers, culture shock, etc. So for us the factual story is we were stressed, flying during covid was frustrating, not knowing Spanish was frustrating, Jon got pick pocketed and got food poisoning and because the expectation of a honeymoon having to be dreamy the disappointment of these things happening did put a damper on our trip. But at the same time, we saw beautiful sights, drank good wine, ate free food, enjoyed seeing a new place together and exploring new things. So when people ask me how it is- I might tell them some of the down parts but its never in a complaining or woe is me way but more of a “I think we did pretty well for the first time traveling abroad together considering some bad luck” type of way. Overall the good outweighed the bad and I want to remember that from my honeymoon, not the bad parts because my gratitude that we could even go and we got to see what we saw and we grew together as a couple is greater than the bad and that’s not being fake that’s believing in the good.

We started this sermon acknowledging that we are all hungry, we are all left wanting. Today we talked about our hunger for redemption and for resurrection. For the yearning to let go of the shame that keeps us wanting. We talked about how maybe some of that hunger could be satisfied in the way we perceive ourselves and our stories.

Toni Morrison in her book Beloved says this, “She did not tell them to clean up their lives, or go and sin no more. She did not tell them they were the blessed of the earth, its inheriting meek, or its glory-bound pure. She told them that the only grace they could have is the grace they could imagine. That if they could not see it, they could not have it.”

If you can’t see it, you can’t have it. If you can’t experience redemption or resurrection, you can’t tell a redemptive or resurrective story. This is what Christ came to give you- Christ offers you redemption and resurrection. If you can accept this- you can use it- use it to start telling a different story- one in which goodness prevails and in which you deserve a good story line, a better plot. Is the narrative you are writing one of redemption?

Come and See!

John 1:35-42

Who in here would consider themselves stubborn? Like most characteristics there are positive and negatives sides to this personality trait. I am very stubborn- I am loyal, feel convicted often, and have pretty good follow through. The downside is it can be seen as relentless, exhausting and for me entitled- you see most things I am stubborn about has to do with wanting- wanting not this or that but both- I don’t want to pick. I will get both things- whatever the things are. You can see this in a small way with the way I dress- most often with my shoes as I think I mentioned before- I want to walk and mow the grass or cut down the Christmas tree but I want to do them in the shoes I want and so that is what is going to happen. We walked over 10 miles a day in Spain and did I listen to Jon and wear sneakers? Absolutely not. You can see it in funny ways where for a month or so I got so excited about how I found out the rival cities I love- Philadelphia and Pittsburgh were actually joined as one football team named The Steagles for a year in ww2 because so many men were drafted they didn’t have enough men to make two teams. I bought their shirt and I told everyone I saw about it. When I wear The Steagles shirt- I can be in harmony with both my cities- Philadelphia and Pittsburgh and I don’t have to choose. You can see this in big ways too…

 In the text we read today we read of two disciples of John that become disciples of Jesus. The thing that gets me about this text though is that they make it look so easy. They make it look like the decision to change your life is so simple and quick. At first glance it looks like they are just giving up a day out of curiosity for who Jesus is but in this decision to follow him they are deciding to take a different life route than the one laid out for them. It is clear they know who Jesus is and they are not only intrigued but inspired. For them, to literally follow Jesus the rest of their lives is an easy decision. They were so excited about his they went to tell their family and friends and see if they too wanted to come.

It’s been a long time since I had this feeling- this excitement and confidence that makes it easy to flip your life upside down. To want something so much, changing everything for it doesn’t seem like a big deal. I saw this a lot last week in Spain. We talked with Americans who had moved there and were loving this non-traditional European lifestyle. It didn’t seem like a difficult decision to leave their life in the states and they didn’t have the desire to move back. Someone gave them an opportunity and they jumped at it. Just like Jesus did with these disciples.

I think they make it look easy because for them it is. For the Americans moving to Europe it’s easy because these are people who have already identified themselves as unhappy with the culture and society in the states. They yearned to get out of the harsh work culture and traditional expectations their family had on them. They yearned to eb somewhere where what made them different in America made them belong somewhere else. And for Jesus’ disciples- they wanted more. They had probably been yearning for something more for a long time. They wanted more purpose, more excitement, to be a part of change and history.

What more do you want?

Now maybe I am wrong because I am still young but I feel like in our society we are not supposed to ask this question as we get older. This question of what more do you want is okay in your 20’s but then it gets less and less okay to ask. Or its not nearly as encouraged or supported. Why as kids are we encouraged to dream and wander and risk and when we get to be an adult ( not sure what age that is anymore) its considered frivolous or irresponsible.

God is a God of abundance. Jesus tells them to come and see. See all the more I have for you. Sure he was saying see who I am, what I’m about but he was also saying come- you can be apart of this too. I wonder if we get scared to keep asking for more, to keep wanting. Never being content and always desiring more I don’t think are the same thing. I think when you are content then you allow yourself to ask what’s next. I’m not talking about the over-consumerism, instant-gratification, obsession with material things aspect of more- that is what we have settled for and its not fulfilling. I’m talking about creating more space in ourselves for more desire, love, hope, adventure, wisdom, awe-worthy moments. What’s wrong with wanting more than a day job, or a marriage or your kids? Wanting more doesn’t make anything less. There is not a finite amount of room in our lives although we may believe that’s true.

Maybe the disciples weren’t as scared of the possibility of more.  This idea of more looks different for everyone. For my generation creating a house out of a van, quitting your job to make money on social media and travel around the world is the “more” a lot of people want. I was just in Spain though for a week and it was stunning and exotic and charmingly antiquated and yet I didn’t want more. I’m not sure what my “more” is but it’s not international travel ( if there were millennials here they would be gasping) , it’s not finding an ulterior way to make money, it’s not the chase of a phd. I don’t know what my “more” is but I am going to start asking myself that question on a regular basis.

If we look closer at the scripture today I think we can find some clues on how to discern what the more is you are looking for. The disciples were intrigued by Jesus because of what he represented and what he offered- life to the full. Proverbs 8:34-35 says, “Blessed is the man that heareth me, watching daily at my gates, waiting at the posts of my doors. 35 For whoso findeth me findeth life, and shall obtain favour of the Lord. They believed that Jesus would give them life. If you bear with me, I am going to get a little theological. We need to explore the question, What is life? Freedom? Purpose, fulfillment, love, peace, solitude, belonging? The church since the beginning has mostly understood life as everlasting life- that this is the main thing Jesus came to give us. But Everlasting life is a cop-out in the way it has been primarily understood- “Pope Benedict XVI in his book, Jesus of Nazareth (Vol.1) says, ‘Eternal life’ is not – as the modern reader might immediately assume – life after death, in contrast to this present life, which is transient and not eternal. Eternal life’ is life itself, real life, which can also be living in the present age and is no longer challenged by physical death. This is the point: to seize ‘life’ here and now, real life that can no longer be destroyed by anything or anyone. Eternal life’ is thus a relational event… Through relationship with the one who is himself life [- God in Jesus], man too comes alive.

Let us try to understand this. We say God is eternal. So, communing with God, that is, sharing in the life of God, is eternal life. And St Augustine defines eternity as “a continuous now”. For God, there is no past and future but only the now. And God is here. Therefore, eternal life is here and now.”

Richard Rohr says, “Jesus’ primary metaphors for the Eternal Now are “the kingdom of God” and “the kingdom of heaven.” He is not talking about a far-off celestial heaven. “Look around you, look at the fields; already they are ready for harvest! Already the reaper is being paid his wages, already he is bringing in the grain for eternal life, and thus sower and reaper rejoice together” (John 4:35-36, Jerusalem Bible). Notice that Jesus says already three times. He is trying to tell us that there is a way that we can live connected to the Real and to the Eternal in this world. That path is surrendering to the here-and-now, whatever it offers us. We might just call this “the will of God,” yet it feels like nothing, like nowhere (now-here), and still it is where everything always happens to us. So be sure to be here now—and not somewhere else! If our minds or hearts are elsewhere, nothing really happens to us that matters or lasts.

Nondual knowing is learning how to live satisfied in the naked now, which some called “the sacrament of the present moment.” This consciousness will teach us how to actually experience our experiences, whether good, bad, or ugly, and how to let them transform us. Words by themselves divide and judge the moment; pure presence lets it be what it is, as it is.”

Eternal life is more than just what comes after you die- it’s what’s happening right now if you can become aware of it. One translation I read about the Greek word life, phrased it as- “in him life was comprehended.” Jesus offers us the opportunity to truly be present in this life-

I don’t think the disciples followed Jesus because following someone is so fulfilling or that glorifying God is the ultimate joy. I think the disciples followed Jesus because he had some pretty good advice and wisdom on how to survive and even thrive. I think the miracle of Jesus is in the practicality of his messages. In all seriousness if I could learn how to comprehend life more- my life would be all those things I listed before- more peaceful, serene, joyful, purposeful, loving. Jesus was they key to learning how to be truly present.

So if Jesus came to give us life- to help us figure out how to be truly present in this life than maybe the “more” is anything that helps you do that. Contrary to earthly temptations- we hear more and more stories of people opting out of those in favor of learning to love themselves and be true to themselves.

A good example of this is the stories coming out of this year’s Olympics. I became a little obsessed with women’s gymnastics- it blows my mind.  The danger. They are trying to decide what is the more they want- is it Olympics, competition, to be a normal teenager, to have a voice, to be in charge of their bodies, to not care what other people think. Simone Biles “more” looked different than what people expected. Simone chose to listen to herself, to put her mental health first, to make herself feel safe and proud. She chose to be true to herself. In that scenario she wanted more and she got it. It was controversial because it seemed like less. In every interview she said that while the Olympics went different than she thought this was so meaningful to her and she is proud of the conversations this has created. This was more to her than winning another gold medal.

What’s “more” to you. Ask yourself what helps you be true to who you are. Start there. What comes to mind? In Buddhism they believe that the more you know yourself the more you know God. I believe this as well. I believe that the more true we are to ourselves the better we will traverse this world. Unfortunately there are a lot of voices and opinions and temptations out there that will go to any length to make you doubt that- to make you be someone different than who you truly are. We spend our lives trying to figure out who the person is that we are. Maybe Jesus came to help us to do that. Maybe asking for “more” is simply knowing you deserve to know yourself better. You deserve to find out who you are. You deserve to do whatever it is you need to do for that to happen. Maybe when Jesus asks us to come and see- he’s really showing us a mirror of ourselves. If to know ourselves better is to know God better than the reverse is also true- to know God better is to know ourselves better. Jesus invites us to come and see what he’s about- which is really what we are about since we are made in the image of God. There is no formula for this- its all about how well you know yourself. I have a friend that said every time she has a baby she feels more like herself. I also met a woman last week from Germany who was in Granada with us who said her husband gifted her this trip for her to come alone and spend time with herself and this she said made her true to herself. Don’t feel guilty about continuing to figure out who you are more and more. I am going to ask myself what makes me feel like myself and what “more” do I want to make that happen and I hope you feel you can do the same.